Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Sunday, August 9, 2009
Overliving
I found a perfect descriptive term for my life as a (full-time, working) obgynmom attempting to train for triathlons, per Joe Friel's Training Bible, under the chapter dealing with the spectrum of over training: "Overliving". It describes the attempt to balance parenthood, full time employment and triathlon training. In particular for OBs, summertime is the time when we are very likely overliving as we try to balance these parts of life. The peak season for babies being born (just look 9 months back to see the reason), as well as vacations for colleagues AND the season for triathlons all converge into 3 months. For me, June and July flew by with 24+ -hr calls every three nights (no Mem Day, no July 4th holidays) yielding 100- hour work- weeks. In this period, I had the simultaneous joy and exhaustion of parenthood, delivering 3-4 babies every call night (typically between 1 and 5am) and training for-- and participating in-- sprint triathlons. I am sure there are similar situations with lawyers who travel, businessmen and the like (although less likley to be seasonally- based). I had a sense (not clearly until I read Friels book) of this sort of thing as I formally started training for triathlons on May 1st of this year. I decided to minimize this sort of thing by signing up with a terrific triathlon coaching service on that date. Somehow I still manged to "overlive".
On the one hand, "overliving" is appealing-- what a full life! But I am acutely aware that it is unsustainable in the long run. I have a colleague who believes it impacts the immune system and eventually may be a hit that leads to cancer. She may be right. I am familiar with fellow triathletes who get more frequent head colds or other viral infections during this season. We all know the interaction between lifestyle and the immune system is so far from being understood.
The rewards from what we do in this phase of living make it all the more difficult to bring it back to normalcy: The slightly less than normal amount of sleep is adapted by the body, the workouts completed are rewarded physiologically as the body achieves perceptible fitness, a seasoned specialist is able to rely on experience and knowledge throughout this short period at work and children and spouse accept that that it is part what makes up the worker-parent-athlete.
This past week, (finally!) having a reprieve from hospital call, on a training taper week (meaning short workouts) and glycogen (carbo-) loading in preparation for my A race, it took as much discipline to cut back on the frenetic pace as it has been to keep it going. On Sunday August 9th, in celebration of my upcoming 45th birthday, I participated in my very first International ("Olympic") Distance triathlon (1 mile swim followed by 22 mile bike followed by a 6 mile run). I was surprisingly awarded a medal as I came in third for my age group. How cool was that??!! Yes, this absolutely rewards the "overliving" I have done in the past few months, but fortunately due to my supportive family, spouse and friends I am gently reminded of the life "outside". So, shortly I will happily end this phase and move on to the "off-season".
On the one hand, "overliving" is appealing-- what a full life! But I am acutely aware that it is unsustainable in the long run. I have a colleague who believes it impacts the immune system and eventually may be a hit that leads to cancer. She may be right. I am familiar with fellow triathletes who get more frequent head colds or other viral infections during this season. We all know the interaction between lifestyle and the immune system is so far from being understood.
The rewards from what we do in this phase of living make it all the more difficult to bring it back to normalcy: The slightly less than normal amount of sleep is adapted by the body, the workouts completed are rewarded physiologically as the body achieves perceptible fitness, a seasoned specialist is able to rely on experience and knowledge throughout this short period at work and children and spouse accept that that it is part what makes up the worker-parent-athlete.
This past week, (finally!) having a reprieve from hospital call, on a training taper week (meaning short workouts) and glycogen (carbo-) loading in preparation for my A race, it took as much discipline to cut back on the frenetic pace as it has been to keep it going. On Sunday August 9th, in celebration of my upcoming 45th birthday, I participated in my very first International ("Olympic") Distance triathlon (1 mile swim followed by 22 mile bike followed by a 6 mile run). I was surprisingly awarded a medal as I came in third for my age group. How cool was that??!! Yes, this absolutely rewards the "overliving" I have done in the past few months, but fortunately due to my supportive family, spouse and friends I am gently reminded of the life "outside". So, shortly I will happily end this phase and move on to the "off-season".
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Culture & Sensitivity and Tri Coaching
May 15th 2009 marked my one year anniversary of committing to (near-) daily exercise. In my quest for finding the work-exercise- motherhood (and "spousehood") balance and having just bought my first road bike a few months ago (October 2008), I decided to hire a tri coach on May 1st. However, dear friends, have compassion for the tri coach as she will have to deal with this Greek chick's cultural background. Allow me to speak for me and my fellow Greeks: we love challenges... but as soon as we feel we are being herded onto a linear track, we get (and often act upon) an urge to make a zig-zag to the finish line, for no apparent reason whatsoever. I realized this urge when years ago--high school-- I got a D in English b/c I butted heads with the teacher who required an outline submitted 2 weeks prior to submission of any paper. I did not comply-- I would submit them together. (My rationale: not everybody thinks in outlines! Some writers can put thoughts on paper and then organize.) Needless to say, my friends who followed the rules got in to Nat'l Honor Society that year and I did not. However thank God even mediocre public high schools such as mine sometimes have a few truly dedicated teachers who have no interest in imposing a process. Phew! --After that, blew away AP English! Also, thank God, the greatest college on the planet, Vassar, recognized this kind of MO (and it helped to have some great grades after that stalemate) and accepted me. So, sure following the straight and narrow path is the most direct, efficient way, indeed, but not the only way to reach the finish line. Consider the alternative a "scenic route". Perhaps that is why triathlon is so popular--the training doesn't feel "linear". Perhaps that is also why trail running and off-road cycling are so appealing-- no two steps (or pedal strokes) are alike. And perhaps that is why I love my own specialty, Ob/Gyn, as it affords "scenery", albeit within a narrow path--labor (and even surgery) is so interesting because the patient's unique physiology and personality plays a role in making every single event extraordinary.
Now I have a lovely plan set up with a terrific coach. Note to coach: I'll do my best to follow it to a T, but ummmmm... a pseudopod just might sprout to test the waters outside the plan... oh yes, risk for injury, etc (why else would someone voluntarily veer off course-- to be safe?-- um, nooo!). Yes, sure I want to go for Alcatraz and a half-ironman in 2010, but given my track record for having to follow rules to get there ... "You can take the Greek out of Greece..."
Now I have a lovely plan set up with a terrific coach. Note to coach: I'll do my best to follow it to a T, but ummmmm... a pseudopod just might sprout to test the waters outside the plan... oh yes, risk for injury, etc (why else would someone voluntarily veer off course-- to be safe?-- um, nooo!). Yes, sure I want to go for Alcatraz and a half-ironman in 2010, but given my track record for having to follow rules to get there ... "You can take the Greek out of Greece..."
Saturday, May 9, 2009
Monday, April 13, 2009
Gummed up Gears, Parenting, Age and Equilibrium
Several months since last post! The gears were gummed up... literally and figuratively.
It was a period when a line from the Grateful Dead song kept playing back: " Set up like a bowling pin, knocked down-- it gets to wearing thin... Just keep truckin' on..."
Ohhhh, the challenges of parenting -- holidays and then-- (Theme from "Jaws" playing)-- the unleashing of microbes-- head lice (TWICE), Strep and --plantar warts --?! (Yes indeed, son Georgie picked those up-- God knows where) followed by the usual end-of-winter febrile viral infections with lost school days (and obgynmom and daddy being home allowing the microbes to find greener pastures with the parents). Daddy, despite being exposed more hours was able to escape the latest nasty strain, but I found myself on a beautiful Sunday afternoon in the ED with acute bronchospasm. I balked at steroids but 3 days later, back in the ED, I conceded to taking them -- no they didn't cause psychosis or weight gain or hair growth. What I feared and what happened was that if the illness was serious enough to warrant steroids then it was serious enough for me to be forced to rest until the course of medication was complete. (That was my ordeal-- Imagine my husband having to deal with his hyper, non-exercising very, very cranky, endorphin-withdrawing wife). No spinning w/ Betty, no swim sprints, no tempo runs... just sleep, hydration, prednisone, inhalers, and positive self-talk. And self re-evaluation. "Indeed Kitsa, you may backslide.. its okay. Start (nearly all over again) to build your base... it is a- OK. You don't do this for a living, remember?"
I read a humorous post the other day about having a special category for older triathletes who are parents of young children... some sort of handicap due to sleep deprivation, illness etc. Unfortunately swimmer Dara Torres is a good counter- argument to the parent thing. Let me just say that Ms. Torres is the newest initiate in my pantheon for being an elite, competitive athlete as well as a mother. So, in self-pity, I thought of a different tack: How about having a different category for OB's (and midwives)? -- Unlike our cardiology, orthopedic and other specialty counterparts (since these docs have ED docs and hospitalists to cover them for call) there is no buffer, no physician between a patient at the hospital and the OB. Just think--36 continuous hours of no sleep once a week (sometimes more) has GOT to wear anybody down. Most recently a continuous 68-hour stint flattened me-- but yet I also found it a challenge-- I managed to get back in the saddle after two nights in my own bed and yesterday I even had a great 10K run. Did I feel invincible. And, now being out of the haze, I remind myself, in spite of the field obstetrics "handicapping" one's athletic training and performance, it really IS a blessing to be an obstetrician. It is like being at the finishing line of a women's race-- I find myself cheering women in the delivery room in exactly the same way. "You are so strong", I often find myself telling the Mom-- she should feel invincible too.
Ok, how to re-establish equilibrium with the current schedule?
Current Obgynmom week:
Mon: 5am wake up; lollygag til 5:10am. First cup of joe, throw laundry in, change into work out clothes. Kiss son and spouse (daughter getting beauty sleep), get to gym no later than 6am-- treadmill or outdoor run, depending upon weather. Core work. Coffee cup #2; 8am-8am call. Just 'cause L&D 'aint busy don't mean the ED 'aint busy with women with various pelvic pain and/or bleeding complaints. Possible C/S or laparoscopy in the wee hours of the morning-- a crapshoot.
Tue: Post-call. No exercise-- even if good call night (mantra to self: it is your REST day). Rush from hospital to start office hours 9 til 5. By 3pm, deeply wallowing in self-pity-- status post 4 cups of coffee and 1/4 lb M& M's. Leave office at 5:10pm- rush for pick up of 7-going- on-14 year old daughter from gymnastics. Daughter complains about my tardiness, her hair, piercing her ears and why can't I buy her Gatorade? Argument ensues. Get cranky. Ask husband to please make me his amazing Appletini which has been modified to include ONLY alcohol, no apple juice. Throw laundry into dryer. Coax/cajole/threaten son to practice piano and violin; more forceful threats for daughter to do homework before dinner. Cajole/coax/ threaten both children over dental hygiene at bedtime. Then read bedtime stories and fall in love with kids all over again, lights out at 9pm. Stretching x10 min. Fold laundry. Collapse in bed at 9:30 pm. Promise husband that weekend plans to be discussed on a non-post-call evening.
Wed: 6 am Spin Class with Betty, who is an undercover trainer for the US Navy Seals. Simultaneously love her and hate her as she pushes me so way out of my comfort zone with her exhortations , her motivating music and well-planned work outs. Drink 20 oz Gatorade and still thirsty. End up cursing myself and swearing off Appletinis. Off to hospital for grand rounds, rush back to office til 5. Finish 4 cups coffee by 3 pm. Cub scouts, late dinner, lots of seltzer water in penitence. Sneak Gatorade bottle in trunk so no evidence for daughter. Cajole/coax/threaten... Bedtime stories, fall in love with kids all over again. Stretch x10 min. Fall asleep early again.
Thu: Pool by 5:30 am. Rush to get back to kiss kids goodbye and see them off on school bus. Rush to work. 5:10 pm, running out door, renewed promise to pick up daughter from gymnastics on time. Since it ends at 6:30pm, actually make it on time, or at least no more than 5 min late. Daughter somewhat mollified, but asking for playdates, pierced ears, Gatorade, plans for weekend. Coax/cajole/ threaten ... Bedtime stories... Stretch x10 min, manage to make last minute weekend plans with spouse, collapse in bed by 10 pm.
Fri: Hooray no office today! TM or run by 8am. Kiss kids off at 8:10 am. Errands, laundry, lunch date with spouse. Kids and movie night. Computer games, movies motivate kids to brush teeth for EXACTLY 2 min. Yiayia over for dinner; she reminds me as my mother she feels free to remark on hair/clothes/weight... as well as the non-mundane issues of life-- marriage, career, etc
Sat: 6am bicycle outside or if bad weather, bike on trainer in basement. Kids decide to "givecompany" in basement. Fight ensues, tears, accusations, he/she said... SLDs ("single leg drills") interrupted. I turn on TV (PBS) in basement. Both kids quiet. Word Girl, Planet Zulu... Thank God. Resume workout-- now do I start those 30 sec intervals all over again? Husband disappointed that TV is on... states it stifles creativity. "Oh yeah? I'll show you creativity."
If it is a non-call day, perform shuttle service-- divide and conquer-- husband goes east w/son, for violin I go west w/daughter for horseback. Meet back at home for piano lessons.
Sun: Call best friend and neighbor (oh and by the way a pedi orthopedic surgeon and accomplished athlete-- ok, so who is not intimidated???!). Beg her to take me on a bike ride with her today... 20 miles of her leading pulls me along. She is a mother of two (smaller children) so we negotiate around nap times. I continue to beg. Husband rolling eyes but ready to beg for me since he knows crankiness is on the menu if nothing done soon. If no go w/friend -- I go out for a LSD (long slow distance) run. Waffles and kids waiting after run-- so very motivated to keep running (and improve PB). Family time, evening resumes with cajole/coax/threaten (homework, dental hygiene)... bedtime stories, stretching, sleep.
Maybe this is as good as it gets in terms of finding a schedule/ balance. A very close friend from med school, residency and now a high risk OB recently stated to me that I seem to create and thrive on disequilibrium. (So that I may find a challenge?). But I have noticed this behavior in friends my age and older-- is this not the upside of midlife? Let's go kayaking, Nora!
It was a period when a line from the Grateful Dead song kept playing back: " Set up like a bowling pin, knocked down-- it gets to wearing thin... Just keep truckin' on..."
Ohhhh, the challenges of parenting -- holidays and then--
I read a humorous post the other day about having a special category for older triathletes who are parents of young children... some sort of handicap due to sleep deprivation, illness etc. Unfortunately swimmer Dara Torres is a good counter- argument to the parent thing. Let me just say that Ms. Torres is the newest initiate in my pantheon for being an elite, competitive athlete as well as a mother. So, in self-pity, I thought of a different tack: How about having a different category for OB's (and midwives)? -- Unlike our cardiology, orthopedic and other specialty counterparts (since these docs have ED docs and hospitalists to cover them for call) there is no buffer, no physician between a patient at the hospital and the OB. Just think--36 continuous hours of no sleep once a week (sometimes more) has GOT to wear anybody down. Most recently a continuous 68-hour stint flattened me-- but yet I also found it a challenge-- I managed to get back in the saddle after two nights in my own bed and yesterday I even had a great 10K run. Did I feel invincible. And, now being out of the haze, I remind myself, in spite of the field obstetrics "handicapping" one's athletic training and performance, it really IS a blessing to be an obstetrician. It is like being at the finishing line of a women's race-- I find myself cheering women in the delivery room in exactly the same way. "You are so strong", I often find myself telling the Mom-- she should feel invincible too.
Ok, how to re-establish equilibrium with the current schedule?
Current Obgynmom week:
Mon: 5am wake up; lollygag til 5:10am. First cup of joe, throw laundry in, change into work out clothes. Kiss son and spouse (daughter getting beauty sleep), get to gym no later than 6am-- treadmill or outdoor run, depending upon weather. Core work. Coffee cup #2; 8am-8am call. Just 'cause L&D 'aint busy don't mean the ED 'aint busy with women with various pelvic pain and/or bleeding complaints. Possible C/S or laparoscopy in the wee hours of the morning-- a crapshoot.
Tue: Post-call. No exercise-- even if good call night (mantra to self: it is your REST day). Rush from hospital to start office hours 9 til 5. By 3pm, deeply wallowing in self-pity-- status post 4 cups of coffee and 1/4 lb M& M's. Leave office at 5:10pm- rush for pick up of 7-going- on-14 year old daughter from gymnastics. Daughter complains about my tardiness, her hair, piercing her ears and why can't I buy her Gatorade? Argument ensues. Get cranky. Ask husband to please make me his amazing Appletini which has been modified to include ONLY alcohol, no apple juice. Throw laundry into dryer. Coax/cajole/threaten son to practice piano and violin; more forceful threats for daughter to do homework before dinner. Cajole/coax/ threaten both children over dental hygiene at bedtime. Then read bedtime stories and fall in love with kids all over again, lights out at 9pm. Stretching x10 min. Fold laundry. Collapse in bed at 9:30 pm. Promise husband that weekend plans to be discussed on a non-post-call evening.
Wed: 6 am Spin Class with Betty, who is an undercover trainer for the US Navy Seals. Simultaneously love her and hate her as she pushes me so way out of my comfort zone with her exhortations , her motivating music and well-planned work outs. Drink 20 oz Gatorade and still thirsty. End up cursing myself and swearing off Appletinis. Off to hospital for grand rounds, rush back to office til 5. Finish 4 cups coffee by 3 pm. Cub scouts, late dinner, lots of seltzer water in penitence. Sneak Gatorade bottle in trunk so no evidence for daughter. Cajole/coax/threaten... Bedtime stories, fall in love with kids all over again. Stretch x10 min. Fall asleep early again.
Thu: Pool by 5:30 am. Rush to get back to kiss kids goodbye and see them off on school bus. Rush to work. 5:10 pm, running out door, renewed promise to pick up daughter from gymnastics on time. Since it ends at 6:30pm, actually make it on time, or at least no more than 5 min late. Daughter somewhat mollified, but asking for playdates, pierced ears, Gatorade, plans for weekend. Coax/cajole/ threaten ... Bedtime stories... Stretch x10 min, manage to make last minute weekend plans with spouse, collapse in bed by 10 pm.
Fri: Hooray no office today! TM or run by 8am. Kiss kids off at 8:10 am. Errands, laundry, lunch date with spouse. Kids and movie night. Computer games, movies motivate kids to brush teeth for EXACTLY 2 min. Yiayia over for dinner; she reminds me as my mother she feels free to remark on hair/clothes/weight... as well as the non-mundane issues of life-- marriage, career, etc
Sat: 6am bicycle outside or if bad weather, bike on trainer in basement. Kids decide to "give
If it is a non-call day, perform shuttle service-- divide and conquer-- husband goes east w/son, for violin I go west w/daughter for horseback. Meet back at home for piano lessons.
Sun: Call best friend and neighbor (oh and by the way a pedi orthopedic surgeon and accomplished athlete-- ok, so who is not intimidated???!). Beg her to take me on a bike ride with her today... 20 miles of her leading pulls me along. She is a mother of two (smaller children) so we negotiate around nap times. I continue to beg. Husband rolling eyes but ready to beg for me since he knows crankiness is on the menu if nothing done soon. If no go w/friend -- I go out for a LSD (long slow distance) run. Waffles and kids waiting after run-- so very motivated to keep running (and improve PB). Family time, evening resumes with cajole/coax/threaten (homework, dental hygiene)... bedtime stories, stretching, sleep.
Maybe this is as good as it gets in terms of finding a schedule/ balance. A very close friend from med school, residency and now a high risk OB recently stated to me that I seem to create and thrive on disequilibrium. (So that I may find a challenge?). But I have noticed this behavior in friends my age and older-- is this not the upside of midlife? Let's go kayaking, Nora!
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